awww, thank you all for the comments! They really are helpful to read. Everyday is a journey to another day and another day and it is always changing. I know that if we weren't battling these issues it would just be some other mind warping situation that would make me feel like a failure! haha. I guess the only parents who feel like failures are the ones who are trying their hardest not to be failures.
Of course...it is so easy to beat yourself up and imagine that had you gotten in that extra 5 minutes of sensory yesterday he would not have scribbled a picture and would have stayed inside the lines for once, but that isn't realistic.
With the girls I am pretty certain they will figure out coloring in the lines and handwriting and learning to ride a bike, but with boy I know it is more difficult for him...the things of childhood don't come naturally to him.
But with all of that aside, I have to remember that there are other things that he does amazingly well that most other people are completely incapable of doing...the girls won't memorize full length movies, or remember exactly what they were wearing the first day it snowed last year, or be able to add or multiply any numbers together quickly because they've stored the answers to memory... I have to get my brain out of the mold of what a child *should* act like, be like, think like...we are all uniquely different. Gotta remember that!
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
overwhelmed
I think things are becoming overwhelming at school for boy. I am going to email the teacher after this blog. It seems like he comes from school and just becomes out of control kid, which I think is a reaction to trying so hard to keep it together all day. It has to be a lot for a kid to try to bear.
So, because of the fact that he comes home and turns into a tangled mess of unfocused'ness, he cannot sit to work on homework and he melts down super easily. Tonight we are going to try to not do homework directly after school and instead let him have some playtime first. I now recall his therapist suggesting that immediately after school he goes to his room and gets to play with whatever he wants until he feels as though he has unwound himself enough, with no interruption from the girls. We have tried to implement it with him, but he insists that he does not need to do that. Today I am going to insist that he try it out.
Another thing that is becoming increasingly more difficult is the fact that our morning routines are completely out of control. We have a pretty simple routine that is charted out for him to follow and everything works well up until showertime -- he gets up, lets the dog out, eats breakfast and takes a shower...
...when he gets out of the shower, he gets out as a totally different kid! I wonder if it is the water that jostles him to life and into a frenzy? Maybe some kind of sensory situation...whatever it is, it is unbearable. When he is in this mode, he is no longer able to follow the routine chart. I tell him simple things to do like "Put your underwear on" and he just sits there, even if he repeats it back to me. It seems as though he is in a daze that he cannot be shaken out of. "Put on your underwear" "Put on your underwear" "Put on your underwear" is what I chant throughout the house with "What are you supposed to be doing?" and then I start just saying "underwear", "underwear", "remember underwear" and it goes on and on, then we get those on and we move to the undershirt. It would just be quicker for me to dress him myself, but then what happens? He's 13 and can't dress himself for school?
*sigh*
So on top of all of this craziness, I also get to sit everynight and contemplate the things we didn't accomplish during the day that we should have...
..oh crap, we didn't do sensory today or
..oh crap, I bet he had milk today or
..oh crap, forgot to track his anxiety levels today or
..oh crap, we should have studied spelling tonight or
..oh crap, I should have had him do his callirobics or
..oh crap, I forgot to brush him this morning or...
...it just goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and I know that is true with anyone who has kids, all of the "oh crap" moments, but I swear I feel like our "oh crap" moments are detrimentally affecting the progress we are trying to make with him.
so...blah.
So, because of the fact that he comes home and turns into a tangled mess of unfocused'ness, he cannot sit to work on homework and he melts down super easily. Tonight we are going to try to not do homework directly after school and instead let him have some playtime first. I now recall his therapist suggesting that immediately after school he goes to his room and gets to play with whatever he wants until he feels as though he has unwound himself enough, with no interruption from the girls. We have tried to implement it with him, but he insists that he does not need to do that. Today I am going to insist that he try it out.
Another thing that is becoming increasingly more difficult is the fact that our morning routines are completely out of control. We have a pretty simple routine that is charted out for him to follow and everything works well up until showertime -- he gets up, lets the dog out, eats breakfast and takes a shower...
...when he gets out of the shower, he gets out as a totally different kid! I wonder if it is the water that jostles him to life and into a frenzy? Maybe some kind of sensory situation...whatever it is, it is unbearable. When he is in this mode, he is no longer able to follow the routine chart. I tell him simple things to do like "Put your underwear on" and he just sits there, even if he repeats it back to me. It seems as though he is in a daze that he cannot be shaken out of. "Put on your underwear" "Put on your underwear" "Put on your underwear" is what I chant throughout the house with "What are you supposed to be doing?" and then I start just saying "underwear", "underwear", "remember underwear" and it goes on and on, then we get those on and we move to the undershirt. It would just be quicker for me to dress him myself, but then what happens? He's 13 and can't dress himself for school?
*sigh*
So on top of all of this craziness, I also get to sit everynight and contemplate the things we didn't accomplish during the day that we should have...
..oh crap, we didn't do sensory today or
..oh crap, I bet he had milk today or
..oh crap, forgot to track his anxiety levels today or
..oh crap, we should have studied spelling tonight or
..oh crap, I should have had him do his callirobics or
..oh crap, I forgot to brush him this morning or...
...it just goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and I know that is true with anyone who has kids, all of the "oh crap" moments, but I swear I feel like our "oh crap" moments are detrimentally affecting the progress we are trying to make with him.
so...blah.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
School House Rocking...
...a kick off the block, for our favorite School House, School House Rock!
Oh wow, School House Rock is back in full force as one of our obsessions...oh joy! Nonstop listening to the music, which at least we are on something educational so that is a bonus.
Handwriting is still such a huge issue for us, oy! Sensory therapy is helping, but we just really need to slow him down a lot. We are at sensory therapy right now doing homework until his therapist comes out and let me tell you...nightmarish! UGH!
To me the worse part of his aspergers is his inability to focus on homework!
Oh wow, School House Rock is back in full force as one of our obsessions...oh joy! Nonstop listening to the music, which at least we are on something educational so that is a bonus.
Handwriting is still such a huge issue for us, oy! Sensory therapy is helping, but we just really need to slow him down a lot. We are at sensory therapy right now doing homework until his therapist comes out and let me tell you...nightmarish! UGH!
To me the worse part of his aspergers is his inability to focus on homework!
Sunday, October 18, 2009
long time no post
"Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peach of mind." ~Christian Larson
It has been quite a while since I have posted something on the blog. I think we have become overwhelmed in the chaos of the school year now that everyone is settled in to their work. All I know is I am exhausted!
Where to start with where we are at...
I am intensely dreading this Halloween season. I feel horrible forbidding the eating of chocolate in the house, but I know (and boy realizes too) what milk does to him and it is just impossible for him to function with milk in his system. I do let him "cheat" sometimes on the weekend, but we definitely pay for it after. It still amazes me what milk does to him. I think the things that he misses the most are mac-n-cheese and pizza. I have been searching for shredded milk-free cheese and cannot find it. I mentioned this to the sensory therapist and she suggested I buy the block of milk free cheese and....wait for it....shred it myself! DUH?! Seriously, why did I not think of that myself? Oh yeah, that's right because half the time I can't even remember my name or what day of the week it is.
Anxiety levels are very high lately and we are trying different ways of tracking that for him so his therapist can work through it with him, but he has anxiety over having to mark the anxiety chart that he has anxiety...this is my life. Today we played outside in the leaves and the kids next door were taking our leaves to their yards....anxiety ensued...
The sensory therapy is the best thing we have EVER done...ever...period. His OT is so amazingly kind and understanding and she really knows how to get through to him. She has been working on his handwriting, coordination, fine motor skills and I believe we are seeing some pretty good results. We really need to slow down his handwriting and coloring so we are working with Callirobtics, which is writing in patterns to classical music, to the beat of the classical music. The problem is that he tenses up when writing, looks really closely at the paper and moves quickly for fear of not being able to finish quickly enough. Gotta slow him down a few beats.
Friendships are still difficult for him. It breaks my heart to see him so stuck in his ways.
So, overall we have not had much progress to report on, but we are still working hard.
Newest obsession to report on -- School House Rock. This one is an obsession from about two years ago that is now making its way back around town. He listens to it nonstop and sings all of the song. I am a pretty huge fan of SHR so I'm happy to hear the music and dance to it while cleaning the house...in about a week I will be pulling my hair out to "I'm just a Bill", can't wait.
It has been quite a while since I have posted something on the blog. I think we have become overwhelmed in the chaos of the school year now that everyone is settled in to their work. All I know is I am exhausted!
Where to start with where we are at...
I am intensely dreading this Halloween season. I feel horrible forbidding the eating of chocolate in the house, but I know (and boy realizes too) what milk does to him and it is just impossible for him to function with milk in his system. I do let him "cheat" sometimes on the weekend, but we definitely pay for it after. It still amazes me what milk does to him. I think the things that he misses the most are mac-n-cheese and pizza. I have been searching for shredded milk-free cheese and cannot find it. I mentioned this to the sensory therapist and she suggested I buy the block of milk free cheese and....wait for it....shred it myself! DUH?! Seriously, why did I not think of that myself? Oh yeah, that's right because half the time I can't even remember my name or what day of the week it is.
Anxiety levels are very high lately and we are trying different ways of tracking that for him so his therapist can work through it with him, but he has anxiety over having to mark the anxiety chart that he has anxiety...this is my life. Today we played outside in the leaves and the kids next door were taking our leaves to their yards....anxiety ensued...
The sensory therapy is the best thing we have EVER done...ever...period. His OT is so amazingly kind and understanding and she really knows how to get through to him. She has been working on his handwriting, coordination, fine motor skills and I believe we are seeing some pretty good results. We really need to slow down his handwriting and coloring so we are working with Callirobtics, which is writing in patterns to classical music, to the beat of the classical music. The problem is that he tenses up when writing, looks really closely at the paper and moves quickly for fear of not being able to finish quickly enough. Gotta slow him down a few beats.
Friendships are still difficult for him. It breaks my heart to see him so stuck in his ways.
So, overall we have not had much progress to report on, but we are still working hard.
Newest obsession to report on -- School House Rock. This one is an obsession from about two years ago that is now making its way back around town. He listens to it nonstop and sings all of the song. I am a pretty huge fan of SHR so I'm happy to hear the music and dance to it while cleaning the house...in about a week I will be pulling my hair out to "I'm just a Bill", can't wait.
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